The small matter of settling down

Recently back and hot on the dating scene, LMM was asked where it was that she saw herself settling down.  You would think this might be a normal question in the dating world, right?  But when seemingly incapable of providing a solid answer, one couldn’t help but feel caught off guard not to mention more than a little inadequate. In a world where anything goes and anything is possible, should we still feel the need to settle down at all?

There is certainly merit in having the good old five year plan.  As repeated to death as it may be, the fact of the matter is that having goals, ambitions and aspirations really does work.  For some of the more commitment phobic amongst us, having just a 12 month vision to work to can be incredibly useful.  Whatever it is you wish to fulfill, you can still have a magnitude of things to accomplish without the need to ‘settle down’ in one place.  So then maybe the notion of settling down is a subconscious plan which many of us feel obliged to reach in order to have some kind of fulfillment, or to consider ourselves a success.

Argument could prevail that a fear of settling down might have some kind of psychological background supposedly connected to a bad childhood or divorced parents.  As far as LittleMiss is concerned, the concept of settling down is quite simply someone else’s vision.  A vision that is not about her, her very conservative upbringing or her still very married parents.  Rather, LMM has many things she wants to achieve all as part of her own plan – none of it which requires settling down in one location.  If love happens along the way, it will still be beautiful.

Next time you’re on a date and the topic of settling down comes up, try asking the same question back.  It could be more insightful than you think. 

Yours, LMM. xoxo