Things I am good at:
Shopping at Tiffany
Things I am not good at:
It's remarkable how many people ask what I do with my time during the hours when I can't sleep. As though there are vast reserves of energy available at 3am to invest in more productive things like unpacking the dishwasher, or alphabetising my DVD collection.
Energy levels aside, I'm fairly unmotivated to be domestically productive at the best of times, let alone when it's well past your average sleepy time.
So, I go online.
Being slightly addicted to real estate, I often find myself perusing properties on something like Homesales.com.au. Even when I've just signed a lease. Even when I've just bought an apartment. Even when it's 2am and I'm wide awake but too exhausted to move. It's like a tiny ray of sunshine in the thick, black, dark of night to look at all the sparkly city pads (or judge the not so sparkly ones...) and think...hmmm yes I could live there. Which, of course, is never going to happen.
Then over to Instagram: for wanderlust FOMO.
To Twitter: as a reminder that this is not the apocalypse and life still exists at 3am (hello, #insomniaclub).
Facebook: for insanely cute animal videos that I only seem to watch between midnight and 5am. And to chat to friends overseas who are going about their regular day in regular time like I'll be attempting to do three hours later.
Drafting a blog: not the informative kind. The reflective, expressive pieces that don't particularly offer anything. Like this one.
Yes, I've heard all about the affects of blue light keeping us awake (argh, my eyes!). Yes, there could be more productive things to do with my wide-awake time (what better time to sort out your sock drawer, I hear you say?).
YES I'VE TRIED CAMOMILE TEA.
Ironically though, even after I've spent two hours winding down, reading a book, not looking at any evil bright lights, and feeling completely worn out, I still lay awake for hours on end willing myself to sleep. This is followed by a hissy fit at none of it working, and reaching for my phone or laptop instead which invariably makes me tired enough to doze off.
All I can say is - thank the insomnia gods for the Internet.
Trouble sleeping? What's your ironic insomniac behaviour?